WE GAVE RETROUVAILLE A CHANCE

 

Paul:   I, Paul Raj, and my wife Padma, belong to Resurrection parish, in Bangalore.  Padma and I have been married for 23 years and we are blessed with our son Kritin, who is now 18 years old. After so much of our prayers and finally our decision to adopt a child during our next vacation to India, Jesus had different plans. He blessed Padma to bear a child.

We would like to thank Fr. Arul Raj for giving us this opportunity to give our testimony about Retrouvaille.  It is a program designed to help heal and renew married couples who are drifting apart. The program is available in our diocese.

During our married life, we had experienced many difficulties.  It had been a rollercoaster for us as we are completely two different individuals. As a result, we were separated in the year 2009 for the next 4 years. Just after Padma left to her parental home for the 7th time after our marriage, in the month of July 2009, she approached the Family Court asking for child custody, this time with the influence of her family members and relatives. Kindly note that every time Padma left to her parental home, she left alone as our son is very close to my joint family and as he has been taken care of by my loved ones and me from the time of Padma’s pregnancy, delivery,  till date.

I had to give up my plum job which is still very close to my heart even today, as my entire family including my son and me were going through depression and I had to attend the court very often along with my son. Incidentally, the family court law is more biased towards women, which I had to challenge with evidence every time.               

During the four years of court case, my son and I had to undergo so many tests/trials. One day, the lady Judge took my son alone to her private chamber and threatened him saying: “your father will be put to jail if he refuses to go with his mother to her parental home for the  Dashera School holidays.”  He came running out to me and told me the same. I asked him: “do you want to go?”  He said no. I told him not to worry; I will take care. This was a tense moment in the court hall but my lawyers were able to take care of the situation. To make it short, my prayers were answered. The Family Court gave the verdict in favour of me and my son  Kritin in the year 2013, after nearly four years of trial. 

 

 Padma: I believed this marriage would never work and I had lost hope of getting back together.

 

 Paul: At this juncture, the Retrouvaille Program was announced during Sunday Mass in our parish in the month of March 2013.  I believe this was the answer to my prayers and I took it forward. With the help of Fr. Arul Raj, Padma and I attended the Retrouvaille Weekend in the month of April 2013.

 

 Padma: I was very reluctant to attend this program as I thought our marriage was all over and Paul would ask for a divorce, but this program completely changed my thoughts, as it has been professionally designed, yet quite simple and very effective. It has helped us understand each other. So, we decided to work on our marriage. The step by step process of the post-weekend sessions and the wonderful support from the Retrouvaille team helped us to build an emotional bonding and enriched our relationship. We could experience the miracle touch which enabled us to reunite as a family.  

 

  Paul & Padma:   So we urge all those couples whose marriage has become unloving, uncaring, or whose relationship has grown cold and distant to give Retrouvaille a chance, especially if they are thinking of separation or divorce or are already separated or divorced.  We believe Retrouvaille will definitely help them to rediscover themselves, their spouse and a loving relationship in their marriage.

 

We want to thank you for the patience you had to hear our life story. We ask you to pray for the success of this very necessary ministry.  Thank you and God bless!

Padmavathy & Paul Raj